You can define emotional intelligence. You can even break it down into its key components and explain why EQ is a strong predictor of success in the workplace and beyond. But do you know it when you see it? Can you watch a situation unfold and point out examples of high emotional intelligence? Can you point to areas where EQ could be improved?
Whether you’re a business leader wanting to improve EQ in your organization or an employee seeking to enhance your own EQ skills, you’ll want to hone your ability to recognize high (or low) emotional intelligence in yourself and in others. The emotional intelligence examples below will give you an idea of how EQ plays out in the real world.
Examples of Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace
To better understand what examples of emotional intelligence in the workplace look like, we’ll break them down into the four core components of EQ: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. While emotional intelligence is rarely limited to just one of the competencies, focusing on one at a time can be beneficial as you learn more about EQ in the workplace.
Self-Awareness EQ Examples
The first component of EQ is self-awareness, which is the ability to perceive your own emotions in the moment and understand your tendencies across situations. Here’s an EQ example of what self-awareness looks like in the workplace:
- Jennifer is part of a team of five people, one of whom tends to get on her nerves. So before every meeting with this team member, she takes some time to check how she is feeling emotionally, practice deep breathing, and prepare to be extra patient.
- Denzel is a software engineer who is used to working on his own. He often gets frustrated with his coworkers in meetings when he thinks they are being unproductive. He knows this is a situation he can’t control, so he has learned to sit with that frustration to figure out where it is coming from and how he can respond better when it arises.
- Lena, a regional sales representative, is great at looking at the big picture in situations. She has realized, however, that because she is often focused on the big picture, she tends to miss small but important details. She tries to collaborate on big projects with detail-oriented team members who can counteract this weakness.
Self-Management EQ Examples
The second component of EQ, self-management, is the ability to use awareness of your emotions to stay flexible and direct your behavior positively. Here are some EQ examples of self-awareness in the workplace:
- Despite her preparations with the annoying team member, Jennifer still gets bothered sometimes in their meetings. She has developed strategies to remain calm despite her irritation–taking a deep breath before speaking, redirecting the conversation toward more positive topics, and squeezing a stress ball.
- Denzel’s job often involves tight turnarounds on software fixes if something goes wrong. He used to get flustered by these disruptions to his regular work, but he realized that he can get back to his work sooner if he’s able to pivot quickly to urgent tasks. He loves video games, so he treats the urgent fixes like a foe he has to defeat to get to the next level of a game. This drastically reduces his resistance and frustration and improves his overall productivity.
- Lena has strong opinions about how sales should work, but she knows others in the office have opinions that don’t always align with hers. If she notices emotions rising in a high-stakes meeting, she is willing to set aside her opinion if it will get the team closer to making a decision.
Social Awareness EQ Examples
The third component is social awareness, or the ability to accurately pick up on the emotions of others and understand what is really going on with them. Here’s an EQ example of what social awareness in the workplace can look like:
- Jennifer has noticed that the team member who bothers her often seems bothered in their conversations as well. She now listens and looks for clues that her teammate is getting frustrated, which has increased her understanding and empathy for her.
- Denzel realized that one of the reasons he gets frustrated in meetings is that he’s often focused on himself instead of others. He now keeps a notepad where he writes his thoughts down as they come up, which allows him to stay focused on what others are saying. When he does this, he better understands his coworkers’ motivations and is less likely to get frustrated with them.
- Lena loves to think out loud, but she has realized that in big meetings it’s better for her to observe and listen than to offer her opinion on everything. She takes the first part of every meeting to get a read on the room and how everyone is feeling before entering into the conversation.
Relationship Management EQ Examples
The final component of EQ is relationship management, the ability to use your awareness of your emotions and those of others to manage interactions successfully. EQ examples of relationship management in the workplace include the following:
- As she has implemented EQ strategies in her interactions with the bothersome teammate, Jennifer has noticed that they can work well together when they aren’t frustrated with each other. She’s begun making a concerted effort to chat with her teammate outside of meetings about non-work topics, which has made their meetings much more enjoyable and productive.
- Sometimes Denzel’s frustration in meetings is warranted. When his coworkers start veering off course, he jots down a few notes on what he’s noticing and waits for a time to calmly bring them up in the conversation. Often his gentle reminders bring the meeting back into focus and lead to productive results.
- When Lena’s team gets together, there are a few people who always seem to butt heads. When discussion devolves into arguing, Lena steps in to help each party articulate what they are thinking calmly and clearly. She has found that this is an effective way to resolve conflicts between opinionated people.
Examples of Emotional Intelligence in Leadership
Now let’s look at examples of emotional intelligence in leadership. We’ll break it down into the same four components, focusing on how leaders use emotional intelligence to increase performance and morale in their organizations.
Self-Awareness EQ Examples
- David, a regional sales director, tends to get stressed out at the end of each quarter. When the end of the quarter is approaching, he makes sure his weekends are restful and restorative so he doesn’t let stress get in the way of his productivity.
- Elena is a human resources manager who spends much of her time putting out fires around the office. When she gets anxious in a high-stress situation, she takes a step back to figure out what is making her anxious so she can address that issue before making any important decisions.
- Mei is the VP of Operations at a mid-sized organization. When she first took the position, she noticed herself getting defensive in meetings with the COO. She began journaling after their meetings and realized that her defensiveness stemmed from insecurity about her new role. She learned to recognize when she started getting defensive and pause to remind herself that she deserved to be where she was.
Self-Management EQ Examples
- While David tries to remain balanced during the end of the quarter, many of the sales managers under him don’t. When the temperature inevitably rises in team meetings, David is intentional with what he says and doesn’t say, knowing that his ability to remain collected is often what allows for productive meetings.
- One of Elena’s responsibilities is talking to employees who have complaints. She has a script she likes to loosely stick to when someone brings up a complaint, because she knows that things can easily get derailed if she lets her emotions lead in the conversation.
- When Mei is in meetings with her superiors, she often feels like her opinions are dismissed. While she used to internalize her anger about this, she now gives herself two options: be assertive with her thoughts in the meeting, or realize it won’t be productive to stick to her guns and think through next steps after the meeting is over.
Social Awareness EQ Examples
- David has noticed so much benefit from his restful weekends that he tries his best to give his managers a break whenever he can. If they’ve had a particularly stressful week or he notices morale waning, he gets lunch catered on Friday and lets people leave early if their work for the week is completed.
- When Elena is in a meeting with an employee, she clears her desk, closes her laptop, and puts her phone in a drawer. This allows her to fully focus on the person in front of her, not only listening to what they are saying but also paying attention to body language so she can respond appropriately.
- Despite being dismissed by her superiors, Mei is intentional about listening to the employees under her. She takes note of their strengths and passions, noticing where they thrive and where they could use her support.
Relationship Management EQ Examples
- Whenever possible, David eats lunch with his team members on Friday. He makes a point to talk about non-work topics, learning about the people he leads and letting them get to know him as well. He has noticed that the more he gets to know someone personally, the more trusting they are of his leadership.
- Elena has learned that there are good and bad ways to deliver tough news to employees. Before difficult meetings, she sits down to go over what she plans to say and how she plans to say it, thinking through how the person might respond to the news she delivers.
- Instead of always trying to assert herself in big meetings, Mei has begun meeting one-on-one with her superiors to discuss ideas with them. She’s found that this lowers the stakes and allows for open and honest communication. An added bonus is that she has learned more about her superiors as individuals, allowing her to connect with them on a more personal level.
Decades of research have proven the importance of EQ in leadership, so the more leaders can recognize it in themselves and the people they lead, the more they can harness it to improve their organizations.
How TalentSmartEQ Can Make Your Organization More Emotionally Intelligent
While you can increase EQ on your own, you’ll be much more effective with the help of expert trainers. TalentSmartEQ has the leading assessment for emotional intelligence assessment and development, along with a library of resources and training tools for individuals, leaders, and organizations. Contact us to find out how we can help you harness EQ in your organization.